A Post for Parents

Hi there :)

This week, I got to talking with my mother about everything that we've gone through; reminiscing on how far we have come over the last few months. 

This time last year I didn't want to live at all, let alone start planning for the future -

The only planning I wanted to think about then was planning my funeral.

But now, I'm actively gathering ideas on what to do next,

trying to figure out how to get my life started - 

A life that I actually want.

A life that I'm excited for.

In amongst these musings - during which, many tears were shed - My mother asked me what advice I would give to someone who was in her position; a parent watching their child struggle through mental and emotional battles that few can truly understand.

I told her this:

Emotions happen. 

Just like waves in an ocean.

They are fluid and constantly moving; the waves are going to go up and down, and the tides are going to wash in and out, but all of that is okay.

Even when it's painful, it's still okay. 

It's okay to feel.

Parents will instinctively want to shield their child from any pain, which often leads to them trying to block these waves, to stop them from coming at all.

But, you see,

All that does is build a dam.

Emotions will come, just like waves in an ocean, and delaying the inevitable will only strengthen the impact when the wave finally hits. 

Dams have a lifespan, and will eventually burst; 

When that happens, everything gets flooded.

The best thing to do isn't to stop the wave, but to ride it. 

Find yourself a proverbial surfboard and ride with each other; open and honest, riding the waves, both high and low.

Support your child as they ride the waves; 

Even if that means riding with them.

Don't fear.

You see, the waves aren't good or bad, they just are.

Your perception shapes your reality. When your perception changes, so does the way you handle things; which is why mindfulness is such a vital thing.
In a way, mindfulness and meditation make very good proverbial surfboards.

The more you try and fight a wave, the more you will be swallowed by it.

That's not necessarily because of the wave itself, but because of your efforts to fight it.

So this goes for Parents and children alike;

Young or old,

Observer or participator,

Depressed or otherwise.

Please don't fight the waves, ride with them - They are okay, and so are you.

Thank you, and much love from the Land of the Dragons,

IvyMoon xxx